District L

We don't know what Andre Leon Talley and Joe Zee's job descriptions are either, but if we could guess, the help-wanted listing probably included playing tennis in head-to-toe Louis Vuitton, shouting on TV, and traipsing around Manhattan in a Chanel gorilla costume.

Post by Amanda LaMela

This morning, WWD reassured us that Paris Fashion Week remains unaffected by Europe's current terror threat. To the untrained eye, the editors and other members of the fashion elite seem unfazed, but District L will clue you in on the real story:

Anna Wintour: Assistant #3? I've heard murmurs about terror in Paris. Check everyone within 500 yards for red paint... Hello? ...Well, don't just stand there - GO.

Andre Leon Talley: Oh, my dear! It looks like I'll have to change into my Louis Vuitton 'Nonchalance' cape. I'd hate to ruin my purple mink.

Outside the Louvre, smoking a cigarette.

Ines de la Fressange: Karl, darling... Is something bad happening here? Anna's assistant is scouring the Louvre for suspicious activity and Andre is hiding in his Nonchalance cape.

Karl Lagerfeld: Wrong here? Other than this never-ending pregnancy trend, the obesity epidemic, and society's obsession with "love"? Probably.

Ines de la Fressange: Just warn me. I'll just hide inside your collar and -

Karl: Wait! Look!

Ines: What?!

Karl: Are those jogging pants?? I thought I notified the press. Those are the world's stealthiest weapons of ass production.

Post by Amanda LaMela

But first, how much would you care to bet that Andre Leon Talley is freaking the fuck out over this number right now. Just pair it with a Billionaire Bad Boy's club sweatshirt and maybe a length of chain from Home Depot and he'll be set in the caftan department for another season at least.

But I digress.

This rather unremarkable piece from Nicolas Andreas Taralis' AW 2010 collection for Paris Fashion Week can be forgiven, as the other 27 looks were pure, monolithic attitude- sartorial superheroes. Executed entirely in black and white (but mostly just black, giving special attention to texture), the techno-industrial vibe was apparently not entirely intended. "It's a little more artisanal and handmade, a little less tough," said the designer.

Sorry, but when you send...

This,

This,

This,

and especially this down your runway, the words "artisanal" and "handmade" won't be the first to spring forth from an edtior or retailer's Bic as they take down notes on the line sheet.

But all in all an extremely solid collection- it was nice to see a designer successfully incorporate denim onto the runway and to finally do something new and different with zippers. A good compromise between Gareth Pugh theatrics and Jil Sander sensibility to be sure. Bravo.

-Post by Nicolas Sera-Leyva